March 9, 1970 - a child is born. Me!! This memorable event took place 44 years ago - FORTY-FOUR years ago. I look at that number and it boggles my mind that it is my age. I am older now than when I remember my mom the best. She was in her mid 30's - I in my teens.
I have to say, I have good genes. I been told I don't look 44 and I certainly don't act it. I am at heart and in mind a kid. I am and probably always will be a class clown. I have an incredibly stupid sense of humour. I laugh when people trip and fall (as long as they aren't hurt). I darn near cry watching practical jokes on YouTube and I have been known to make people bleed with my sharp wit (ha ya like that???).
I often wonder if my mind is going to clue in and eventually catch up with my age. To be honest it kind of scares me a little. I don't have anything against aging, it is inevitable and I am doing it every day. I see the lines getting deeper, the skin isn't as taut as it once was, the grey hairs appear a little faster but my mind looks in the mirror and sees 21. But I really hope that my state of mind stays with me as I age. I want to be the one on time out in the senior's home for toilet papering the Director's car.
One of the things that keeps me feeling young is my kids. Oh my - they got the best of their dad and me. My son is fast with the comments, I think my wit is sharp - his is killer. My oldest daughter has this innocent way of just dropping stuff that is so unexpected, you aren't quite sure how to react. My youngest daughter is me. Her sense of humour, like mine, borders on inappropriate but she really does it well. All of them do.
I like where I am in life. It isn't perfect by any stretch of the imagination but I happen to be happy here in this moment. I am learning new things about myself, experimenting a little with life, trying out some things I have never done before and looking a little more to the future. I have a great job that I don't plan on leaving until I retire now, it is stable and consistent and the people I work with and for are great. I have my ladybug (my lovely little red Focus). I have my cozy little home. Oh it's a small, 2-bedroom apartment but it is welcoming and inviting and cozy and I FEEL at home there. I have 3 great kids and I am not speaking with mom bias, they really are great kids and I had something to do with that.
Don't get me wrong, there are parts of my life that aren't good right now and that probably aren't going to get better. It's looking like I am on my way to a second divorce (god, please don't let me become Elizabeth Taylor) but I am choosing to remain positive and "young" at heart and deal with things with a smile on my face and a spring in my step.
Forty-four years of life and learning and mistakes and loss has brought me to this moment, this right now and I am pretty darn good with that. It doesn't make everyone happy - but everyone isn't me.
I got some beautiful flowers and teddy bear from my wonderful friend
Joisey Joe. An awesome cookbook that has recipes catered to how I am eating right now and a TON of birthday wishes from the people that mean so much to me.
So for those of you in my life, thanks for putting up with my humour, my wit, my inappropriateness, all my recent changes and my Peter Pan syndrome. And I am sorry but I don't have any plans of "growing up" in the near future either :P